Formula For A Great Relationship

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Let me start off by saying this: Forget finding your prince/princess in the EXACT sense of the word. Forget about much of what you see in romantic comedies/dramas. Forget about the PERFECT relationship.Now breathe.Yea, I know. If you’ve held onto those concepts for awhile, it might take you aback that I ask you to put them aside right off the break. Why? Because they’re whimsical (SAT word haha) ideals that put a mask on TRUE ideals, making themselves seem relevant and making what we all should be pursuing seem unimportant. So let them go.What are the TRUE ideals? Let’s run through them really quick…

1. Forget finding your prince/princess in the EXACT since of the word.
Instead: Understand what it means to have a prince/princess. Security, someone treating you like you deserve the world (because you do), honesty, respect and an enduring, unconditional LOVE. That is what is represented by the Prince/Princess syndrome. If you’re focusing on the fortune aspect of it, then you’ve completely missed the boat.

2. Forget about much of what you see in romantic comedies/dramas.
Instead: Understand that relationships don’t come from nowhere. Now I gotta admit. I’m a HUGE romantic comedy fan. Some of my favorites include Hitch, The Brothers, Brown Sugar, Two Can Play That Game, Deliver Us From Eva, and ANY romantic comedy that has Sanaa Lathan in it. Seriously. With that being said, I find that many people hold on to the ideal that love and lasting relationships just happen. They don’t, and it takes a lot more than an hour and a half of work to form a solid lasting relationship.

3: Forget about the PERFECT relationship.
Instead: Find the woman/man that put you first. No relationship will be PERFECT, just like no friendship is. There will be times when you can’t STAND the other person (trust me). When trying to decide if a relationship is a good one or not, I usually ask these question: If the relationship were to end today, can I honestly say that I have done all I can to make the other person better? Have they made me a better person? Have we shown growth from when we started til now? You want to find someone you can build with, someone you would fight for, and someone who, even after an argument, will say “I love you”. Also important: Find someone who’s flaws you can handle. If you KNOW you can’t handle a jealous woman/man, don’t get into a relationship with one, no matter how fine/gorgeous he/she might be. There is ALWAYS someone else, you just have to find the RIGHT someone.SOOOOOOOOOO….What is the formula?

Well, as much as I love playing with words, I’m still a math guy. So, I think the Formula looks like this…

              (Love + Honesty + Communication + Hard Work) x 2) – Distractions

GOD x  ——————————————————————————————   = Great Relationship

                 (1 x (Unfaithfulness + Secrets + Dishonesty + Assumptions)) + 1

Breakdown:
Love, Honesty, Communication and Hard work are all necessary to make a relationship a lasting one. Hard work means that you’re committed; not trying to run to the next girl/guy after every fight. Thing is, it takes BOTH parties to make it, hence the “x 2”. But you have to eliminate the distractions (other men/women, bad relationship advice, etc.). But even a relationship with all of these aspects in check can be “divided” by unfaithfulness, keeping secrets from each other, lies and constantly assuming your partner is dogging you when he/she isn’t. The more of this you have in your relationship, the bigger the divide will be. HOWEVER, when your relationship is built WITH GOD FIRST, it has the power to OVERCOME ALL OF IT. Gotta love it.

Agree or Disagree with me if you like. I’d love to hear you comments. What do you think?

~ Signing Off

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